Explore how your reading list is becoming the ultimate filter on dating apps, shaping who swipes right and who's an instant 'ick.' This article reveals how books signal personality, worldview, and even political leanings, but also warns of the risks of classism and superficial judgments in the quest for love.
In the fast-paced world of dating apps, books have emerged as powerful cultural shorthand, acting as instant 'green flags' or 'red flags' for potential partners. Daters like 29-year-old Ayo admit to swiping left on anyone who mentions authors they dislike, such as Jordan Peterson, while being impressed by contemporary literary fiction authors like Ben Lerner or publishers like Fitzcarraldo. This trend is supported by dating app data, with mentions of reading in bios increasing significantly across platforms like Tinder and Feeld, and correlating with 'meaningful connections.' Books are seen as indicators of personality, hinting at emotional openness, nerdiness, sensitivity, or seriousness. However, the article highlights a paradox: books are simultaneously a badge of authenticity and a form of strategic performance. Many daters curate their literary tastes, leading to disappointment when the 'performance' doesn't match reality, as seen in stories of a 'Ulysses' book group leader or a bookshelf adorned with feminist literature belonging to a 'terrible' date. Experts warn against the risks of this book-based filtering, including classism, which can exclude potential partners based on reading habits, and the danger of reducing complex individuals to mere types. The 'red flag' discourse, while sometimes helpful, can also foster an unrealistic expectation of finding a perfect match, neglecting the natural growth and negotiation inherent in relationships. Ultimately, the article suggests that while books offer a quick translation of character, they should be taken as a rough guide, not an infallible judge of a person's worth.
